“Un desayuno prepotente” (“A pretentious breakfast”)
I woke up early that morning because there was a mosquito flying around all night interrupting my sleep. I´ll explain the correlation: I was trying to sleep when the mosquito started attacking me as if I was the only human alive and he was never going to be able to suck on anyone else’s blood. This caused me to fail my mission of reaching the REM stage of my sleep. Which worked as a chain reaction and led to my early wake up. I do not like mosquitos.
My breakfast follows a methodological process, divided in three stages and which is key to my happiness. I first have hot water with lemon while reading the news about the global apocalypse which is taking place. First, “El País”, spanish national newspaper. Then, “El Diario Montañés”, local newspaper where I read about all the beautiful beaches we have in my hometown and how they are becoming the Covid-19 new summer residence. I then move on to the “BBC” where I have found some of the most stupid articles ever written, soon they’ll confirm the queen is a Lizard. Finally, I end up reading the costa rican newspaper “La Nación”, why?— wish I knew. Once I conclude our humanity is not engaged with the concept of “solidarity” and question my moral decisions on how I should be interacting with the world during this crisis, I shred a little tear. This makes me realize I am alive, which means it is time for the second stage of my breakfast. “The Porridge”.
“The porridge”. It´s like D-day. What a stage. My ultimate favorite stage of the breakfast process and probably one of the biggest highlights of my day. Keep in mind, “The Porridge” is not any porridge. Its is sometimes embarrassing for me to admit but unlike most porridges, which tend to be cheap and food of the proletariat, my porridge is best friends with the bourgeoisie. It is not regular porridge, it is teff (some other type of grain) porridge and comes in these tiny little packages which are already rationed for you and I have to further ration because they are so stupidly expensive, yet delicious. Maybe I am still that spoiled nihilist kid after all… Anyways, I pour hot water into the porridge, mash a banana and mix it. I then add the heavenly and precious coconut yogurt and some peanut butter. I stare at the beauty of my porridge bowl for a few seconds before inserting my first spoon. A very tiny spoon, so it last longer. Once I finish I stare at my, this time empty, porridge bowl again and think about how excited I am of having another porridge next morning.
The final stage of my breakfast is the coffee. I love coffee. I am annoying with coffee. As someone who loves coffee, I do not like any coffee. Thankfully I am not as annoying as my brother, who likes coffee so much it would be safer to say he does not like coffee. Most likely he will not like 99% of the coffees being drunk that morning. I normally have a espresso with some hot water on the side. It is also quite a nice stage of my day.
Breakfast is over. A new phase of my day begins. I like to call this phase “The Waiting”, the waiting for my next bourgeoisie, methodological, annoying, nihilist yet romantic breakfast.